Just like telling lies is a human flaw, Cheating will continue to generate arguments and concerns for a variety of reasons. Why do men cheat?
We are far from discovering why men especially, cheat even when they love their women and are happily married or involved in a long-term relationship, their women are pretty, sexy or even have more money than they do. It is generally assume that men, no matter the race or colour, are polygamous by nature. Here are some reasons men cheat on their wifes:
1. Variety and change.
Some men need a lot of variety in their lives. They thrive on new experiences and stimulation and are easily bored by the same thing every day. Most men’s hearts are capable of and can truly love more than one woman at a time. Whereas most woman’s heart tends to be able to love only one man at a time.
2. Poor role models.
A man whose father, uncle, brother cheated on their wives, is most likely to cheat. This is because he is likely to see them as role models. Besides, it is the life he grew up to know, so, he may have been subconsciously programmed to follow their example, seeing infidelity as a norm or way of life.
3. Status symbol.
A man will cheat on his wife/partner if he believes having more than one woman is a status symbol and sign of success. In traditional African setting, the wealth and success of a man is measured by the number of women and children he has. In the time past, a man with one wife was considered a weakling and unsuccessful in the society.
4. When a man get away with Cheating.
If a guy cheats on you the first time and you let him get away with it, chances are that he will do it again knowing there is very little that you can or will do to him. This same theory often holds true for abuse and domestic violence.
5. Boring sex life.
When partners have been together for a while, it is easy for sex to fall into a routine, perhaps, on a particular day of the week and in a particular manner. Some men complain how their wives will never allow them have sex with them in a certain position or how they determine the number of times they can have sex in a month or over a period of time. Some men find this difficult to cope with and because there is little they can do about it, they just look for the fun and variety where they can find it.
6. Excitement and fun that a new affair generates.
According to a research, the kind of excitement one gets in a new relationship is like that of being high on drugs. The excitement, stimulation and novelty men get from new affairs makes them feel alive. Men who live for the thrill of the chase, and new conquests as often as possible to feed their ego and sense of worth, will cheat over and over again, whether they are caught or not.
7. Immaturity.
If he does not have a lot of experience in committed relationships, or if he doesn’t fully understand that his actions will inevitably have consequences like hurting his partner, he may think it is fine to have sexual adventures.
8. Co-occurring Issues.
He may have an ongoing problem with alcohol and/or drugs that affects his decision-making, resulting in regrettable sexual decisions. Or maybe he has a problem like sexual addiction, meaning he compulsively engages in sexual fantasies and behaviors as a way to numb out and avoid life.
9. Lack of Male Social Support.
He may have undervalued his need for supportive friendships with other men, expecting his social and emotional needs to be met entirely by his significant other. And when she inevitably fails in that duty, he seeks fulfillment elsewhere.
10. Confusion Between romantic intensity and long-term love.
He might misunderstand the difference between romantic intensity and long-term love, mistaking the neuro-chemical rush of early romance, technically referred to as limerence, for love, and failing to understand that in healthy, long-term relationships limerence is replaced over time with less intense, but ultimately more meaningful forms of connection.
11.Childhood Abuse.
He may be reenacting or latently responding to unresolved childhood trauma–neglect, emotional abuse, physical abuse, sexual abuse, etc. In such cases, his childhood wounds have created attachment/intimacy issues that leave him unable or unwilling to fully commit to one person. He might also be using the excitement and distraction of sexual infidelity as a way to self-soothe the pain of these old, unhealed wounds.
12.Selfishness.
It’s possible that his primary consideration is for himself and himself alone. He can therefore lie and keep secrets without remorseor regret, as long as it gets him what he wants. It’s possible he never intended to be monogamous. Ratherthan seeing his vow of monogamy as a sacrifice made to and for his relationship, he views it as something to be avoided and worked around.
13.Unfettered Impulse
He may never have even thought about cheating until an opportunity suddenly presented itself. Then, without eventhinking about what infidelity might do his relationship, he went for it.
14.Unrealistic Expectations.
He may feel that his partner should meet his every whim and desire, sexual and otherwise, 24/7, regardless of how she feels at any particular moment. He fails to understand that she has a life of her own, with thoughts and feelings and needs that don’t always involve him. When his expectations are not met, he seeks external fulfillment.
15.Anger/Revenge.
He may cheat to get revenge. He is angry with his mate, and wants to hurt her. In such cases, the infidelity is meant to be seen and known. The man does not bother to lie or keep secrets about his cheating, because he wants his partner to know about it.
There are still many other reasons men cheat like when force into marriage with someone, Distance amongst others. The ones above are the most common reasons men cheat. If you have any reasons peculiar to you or someone you know of which why men cheat, kindly share it with us.
1. Variety and change.
Some men need a lot of variety in their lives. They thrive on new experiences and stimulation and are easily bored by the same thing every day. Most men’s hearts are capable of and can truly love more than one woman at a time. Whereas most woman’s heart tends to be able to love only one man at a time.
2. Poor role models.
A man whose father, uncle, brother cheated on their wives, is most likely to cheat. This is because he is likely to see them as role models. Besides, it is the life he grew up to know, so, he may have been subconsciously programmed to follow their example, seeing infidelity as a norm or way of life.
3. Status symbol.
A man will cheat on his wife/partner if he believes having more than one woman is a status symbol and sign of success. In traditional African setting, the wealth and success of a man is measured by the number of women and children he has. In the time past, a man with one wife was considered a weakling and unsuccessful in the society.
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| You Have To Read These 15 Reasons Why Men Do Cheat |
If a guy cheats on you the first time and you let him get away with it, chances are that he will do it again knowing there is very little that you can or will do to him. This same theory often holds true for abuse and domestic violence.
5. Boring sex life.
When partners have been together for a while, it is easy for sex to fall into a routine, perhaps, on a particular day of the week and in a particular manner. Some men complain how their wives will never allow them have sex with them in a certain position or how they determine the number of times they can have sex in a month or over a period of time. Some men find this difficult to cope with and because there is little they can do about it, they just look for the fun and variety where they can find it.
6. Excitement and fun that a new affair generates.
According to a research, the kind of excitement one gets in a new relationship is like that of being high on drugs. The excitement, stimulation and novelty men get from new affairs makes them feel alive. Men who live for the thrill of the chase, and new conquests as often as possible to feed their ego and sense of worth, will cheat over and over again, whether they are caught or not.
7. Immaturity.
If he does not have a lot of experience in committed relationships, or if he doesn’t fully understand that his actions will inevitably have consequences like hurting his partner, he may think it is fine to have sexual adventures.
8. Co-occurring Issues.
He may have an ongoing problem with alcohol and/or drugs that affects his decision-making, resulting in regrettable sexual decisions. Or maybe he has a problem like sexual addiction, meaning he compulsively engages in sexual fantasies and behaviors as a way to numb out and avoid life.
9. Lack of Male Social Support.
He may have undervalued his need for supportive friendships with other men, expecting his social and emotional needs to be met entirely by his significant other. And when she inevitably fails in that duty, he seeks fulfillment elsewhere.
10. Confusion Between romantic intensity and long-term love.
He might misunderstand the difference between romantic intensity and long-term love, mistaking the neuro-chemical rush of early romance, technically referred to as limerence, for love, and failing to understand that in healthy, long-term relationships limerence is replaced over time with less intense, but ultimately more meaningful forms of connection.
11.Childhood Abuse.
He may be reenacting or latently responding to unresolved childhood trauma–neglect, emotional abuse, physical abuse, sexual abuse, etc. In such cases, his childhood wounds have created attachment/intimacy issues that leave him unable or unwilling to fully commit to one person. He might also be using the excitement and distraction of sexual infidelity as a way to self-soothe the pain of these old, unhealed wounds.
12.Selfishness.
It’s possible that his primary consideration is for himself and himself alone. He can therefore lie and keep secrets without remorseor regret, as long as it gets him what he wants. It’s possible he never intended to be monogamous. Ratherthan seeing his vow of monogamy as a sacrifice made to and for his relationship, he views it as something to be avoided and worked around.
13.Unfettered Impulse
He may never have even thought about cheating until an opportunity suddenly presented itself. Then, without eventhinking about what infidelity might do his relationship, he went for it.
14.Unrealistic Expectations.
He may feel that his partner should meet his every whim and desire, sexual and otherwise, 24/7, regardless of how she feels at any particular moment. He fails to understand that she has a life of her own, with thoughts and feelings and needs that don’t always involve him. When his expectations are not met, he seeks external fulfillment.
15.Anger/Revenge.
He may cheat to get revenge. He is angry with his mate, and wants to hurt her. In such cases, the infidelity is meant to be seen and known. The man does not bother to lie or keep secrets about his cheating, because he wants his partner to know about it.
There are still many other reasons men cheat like when force into marriage with someone, Distance amongst others. The ones above are the most common reasons men cheat. If you have any reasons peculiar to you or someone you know of which why men cheat, kindly share it with us.
